I walked slowly through the aisles of books, running my finger along the spines of the books on the shelf level with my shoulder. I was humming a child's nursery rhyme as I searched for a book that could help me. I felt detached from the rest of the world, and it didn't help that I kept myself locked up in the Faita Mansion for past couple of weeks. Father tried to nudge me to go outside, and Uncle Jin translated his gestures to me, but I didn't feel like I belonged with the rest of the world anymore, I hoped that I would get over this funk but it never passed. Finally I managed to push myself here to be along with the books.
It was quiet and I liked it, the only sound was the faint echo of my humming. The key on my back didn't have anything to make unsatisfactory facial expressions about so his calm, completely serene face gave me goose bumps. I couldn't remember the last time it looked like that. I stopped at a book and was going to pull it out but when my finger touched at the tip of the spine I felt it burn my finger. I can still remember the feeling of my heart skipping a beat at the surprise. I momentarily paused my humming, but after that moment I returned to my humming and hesitantly pulled out the book to the right of that one. It was a book on how to socialize.
I may have a slight dissociative identity issue, and anti-social behavior, but I didn't want to be that way. I wanted to have more friends that weren't family, people that I could play with. I was afraid of the key in my head unlocking the darkness, but I couldn't waste my life away. I was already 9-year-olds but I still hadn't had much of a childhood. I was a Jounin because I spent the majority of my years training, and the fact that I had the body of someone twice my age. Anyone who wasn't family may believe I was simply an 18-year-old kunoichi with subpar skill for someone of that age. I liked to think I was an adult, but that wasn't only to make believe so I wouldn't go crazy.
I sat down at a table and opened the book. I placed the large key from my back underneath it on the table to angle the book. The key was still attached to my back but a thick chain ran from the top of the Key's neck to attach to me. It was questionable, even to me, whether I was actually trying to read the book or just staring at it. I kept humming as no one had come to stop me yet, and I stared blankly at the page as if I wouldn't let myself read it…